This blog post comes to you from me being horizontal on the couch, sweat dripping down my forehead and into my eyes, my thigh muscles aching and throbbing in an oddly rhythmic way.
I, dear friends, worked out for the first time in I’m embarrassed to say how long. It was only for fifteen minutes, but it was fifteen minutes spent doing something I desperately need to start doing more regularly and I’m determined to make it a habit.
I’ve been feeling very down-in-the-dumps physically. I look and feel terrible. My joints hurt, especially that pesky knee of mine and I discovered my foot is also starting to ache due to being several tens of pounds overweight.
My clothes are starting to fit more snug and I have little energy. In general, I feel like shit. I’m tired of that, and tired of looking at myself in the mirror, trying to trick myself into thinking “oh, you don’t look that bad.”
But I do. What was once a bit of belly fat has turned into all out flab. The waistband of my pants cuts me in half when I sit down, and I test the tensile strength of the fabric around my thighs.
I had no idea how much I weighed. At last count at a doctor’s appointment back in December, I weighed 236 pounds. Yesterday, according to the bastard digital scale at work, I now weight 257.
Two hundred fifty-seven pounds. Sweet merciful Christ. And how big and brass are my balls for sharing that with y’all?
The only good thing about that is I’m still fifteen pounds away from weighing what I did at my heaviest, so I’ve got that going for me, which is nice.
As you can tell, I’m starting over again. I lost sixty pounds before…and by golly, I’ll do it again. I need to, because I have no doubt in my mind that if I continue on the path I’m on now, I’ll be dead by the time I’m 40. Honestly, I believe that.
I started today: eating what I know is good for me as compared to what I think is good and doing that little bit of exercise. It felt great to sweat again. I like to sweat…ahem.
Back on the healthy bandwagon. I plan on keeping a regular journal of my progress and whatnot because it’s me and I want to. I hope you all join me in this adventure.
See you next time,